» emotion http://www.catalyst4success.com Fri, 14 Aug 2009 22:16:57 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 en hourly 1 Stories http://www.catalyst4success.com/stories/ http://www.catalyst4success.com/stories/#comments Fri, 14 Aug 2009 22:16:57 +0000 kevin http://www.catalyst4success.com/?p=447 I’m currently reading Be the Hero by Noeh Blumenthal and while I’m finding I agree with his advice, I wonder if it isn’t a little oversimplified. Everything he talks about is the essence of what I teach, but it can take some clients weeks to learn the concept and make the changes that he talks about. Maybe I’m making things too complicated. What are your thoughts?

]]> http://www.catalyst4success.com/stories/feed/ 0 The Power of Words http://www.catalyst4success.com/the-power-of-words-2/ http://www.catalyst4success.com/the-power-of-words-2/#comments Fri, 17 Jul 2009 21:55:17 +0000 kevin http://www.catalyst4success.com/?p=394 The language we use is directly connected to the way we feel. Words respresent the associations we’ve made with our experience with the outside world and our responses to them. This is obvious when we think of major events in our lives. Someone who has lived through a major earthquake will respond with a different set of emotions when they hear the word “earthquake” than someone who hasn’t. Those emotions will vary widely among people who have had the same experience. It depends on the meaning given to that word at the time of the event.
 
Words that have common cultural meaning, however, can evoke remarkably similar emotional responses. And each emotional response has a corresponding physiological response, so this is easy to test.
 
In this exercise, pay close attention to your body and slowly repeat out loud the following phrases:
 
- I can’t
- I’m not
- I wish
- I have to
- I must
- I’ll try
 
Most people describe their body as feeling stiff or tight when repeating these simple words. Their breathing is shallow and their awareness is limited. These phrases presuppose lack, scarcity and uncertainty, things most people like to avoid. Now repeat the following alternative phrases aloud and notice what your body does.
 
- I can
- I am
- I have
- I choose
- I claim
- I will
 
This time you may have even spoken a little louder. Your breathing was a little deeper, and there was a lightness in your body that felt uplifting. Your brain did this for you automatically, the same way it created the feelings with the first group of phrases. These phrases presuppose power, confidence and control over one’s destiny. Presuppositions are great tools for pursuasion – especially with yourself.
 
So for the next 30 days, choose to eliminate the negative phrases in the first group and replace them with the positive phrases in the second group. Just doing this will reduce some of the stress in your life.

]]> http://www.catalyst4success.com/the-power-of-words-2/feed/ 0 The Value of Negative Emotions http://www.catalyst4success.com/the-value-of-negative-emotions/ http://www.catalyst4success.com/the-value-of-negative-emotions/#comments Fri, 03 Apr 2009 16:29:14 +0000 kevin http://www.catalyst4success.com/?p=249 One of the criticisms I’ve had recently concerns my view on optimism. The writer’s opinion was that I dismiss the value of negative emotions and their role in our personal growth. So let me clarify my mission.

I agree that there is value in every emotion! Life is a tapestry made up of all kinds of emotions that add to the richness of our lives. Without the duality of happiness and sadness, neither would have any value. Our culture in the United States however, focuses so heavily on the negative that many people walk around in a perpetual state of numbness, fear and sadness.

Recently I was in a setting where CNN was being broadcast in public a story about the economic crisis was being presented. A woman, who was employed and upon questioning, not directly impacted by anything in the story, began to describe just how “scary ” the whole situation was. It was easy to see her body become tense, her eyes widen and her voice quiver as we spoke. She was genuinely frightened. When I inquired as to what was causing her to feel this way, she couldn’t explain. She said, “I don’t know, it’s just scary.”

I asked her what was happening right now. I asked her to take an inventory of everything going on around her; to notice each detail, to be aware of her breathing, the temperature of the air and my presence in the room. Almost immediately she began to calm down and she thank me for bringing her back to the moment.

If she were facing unemployment or the loss of her home, those feelings might be more explainable, at least initially. In some ways we DO feel our life is threatened when our financial stability is threatened. Too often though, the news and our imagination about events past, present and future put people in this state and keep them there. It becomes a habit that creates stress in the mind and body, and results in illness that is physical.

I don’t deny that there is a full range of emotional responses that one should experience in life. I just advocate that moving through the those emotions that don’t help us move forward to a more powerful, positive state is a more resourceful place to be. It’s perfectly normal and appropriate to be shocked and saddened by a loss of job, but staying in that shocked and saddened state is not the place to be if you want to find a new one. I also firmly believe from experience that life is more joyful in a state of optimism, and isn’t joy what we’d all like anyway?

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